July 1, 2006

Stop F****in' Digging, Already!

There is a proverb, sometimes attributed to folksy cowboy humorist Will Rogers, that says: "If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging." The Washington Nationals, my hometown team, have instead opted to bring in an Earth mover. Timed perfectly to coincide with an 11-1 embarrassment at the hands of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, Stan Kasten made the announcement that Jim Bowden's position as GM of the team is now permanent.

On one level, this was entirely expected. The Lerners and Stan Kasten gave every indication that Bowden would at least finish out the season. Now it looks as though he'll get at least a year or two to demonstrate that he can be an effective general manager. And you know what? I'm fine with it. I think Jim Bowden's a pompous, narcissistic dumbass, but what the hell do I know?

The Lerner family, who just paid significantly over fair market value for this pitiful excuse for a franchise, hired uber-experienced sports executive Stan Kasten to run the franchise. Kasten, who at least knows what a good GM (John Schuerholz) looks like, hired Bowden. Maybe they know something I don't. In fact, I really hope they do know something I don't. Everyone involved praised Bowden's "analytical mind." If he actually has one, that's great, maybe Kasten will force him to use it. Or maybe I just don't understand the context of the word analytical when it's applied to things like the Alex Escobar trade, the acquisition of three back-up 1B and no catchers, and the stunning ability to sign every injured starting pitcher in major league baseball.

I'm actually glad the announcement came when it did, because I'm considerably numbed by having sat through that entire disgrace of a game against the Devil Rays. THE DEVIL RAYS!?!?!! If I were to so much as attempt a game recap this blog would have to be sealed in lead and buried under a mountain in Nevada for the next 5,000 years. Instead, random thoughts:

  • Thank God Dave & I weren't the only bloggers there to witness the carnage. Otherwise, no one would believe us. The Chatter family was in attendance, seat hopping their way through the stadium, in search of a less offensive view of the game, I assume.

  • The Nats really ought to be the starter opponent for every fringe minor league pitcher looking to break into the bigs. That way, they can always talk about the one great major league start they had.

  • As Dave said to me in the aftermath of Carl Crawford's second 2-run homer: "When they said RFK was a pitcher's park, they must have meant opposing pitchers." Who the hell is Tim Corcoran?

  • If I hear word one, just one, from anyone on this roster about how hard it is to hit homeruns at RFK, I will snap. And I will take them with me when I go.

Frankly, I'm a little tired of caring about this team.

1 comment:

Brandon Kriner said...

"Frankly, I'm a little tired of caring about this team."

Me too, Nate. Me too.